Hello people! Please don't be shocked because the one typing this entry now is not michelle. Haha. I am Sam! Haha. For the benefit of those who don't know me, I am her god-brother. Haha. Since, this is her blog I shall use standard english instead of my usual singlish to finish this entry. Anyway, up to this point in time, you guys might still be puzzled over why am I using her blog, let alone blog an entry. Haha. I am going to officially lock this blog until the 'A' Level's are over. This will be the final entry until then, unlike what she said a few entries back where her blog will be closed until further notice. Haha.

sianz...i cant stand it anymore...haha...i feel so tied down writin in tt way...haha...now i will take this chance to do the ultimate tag...haha...

nu ren...notti ar u ...say close liao still open...summore open until 2 entries...zhen shi de...haha...but alrite la...i can understand tt a lvl veri stressed one...i mean i went thru it wat...so hang in dere...remember the rainbow i sent u for ur promos last year? hope u will b able to show mi one back in terms of ur a lvl cert. ...haha... so u better buck up n work hard liao...NO MORE unnecessary distractions... if not i WILL personally REMOVE dem one by one... esp dose sms ar... dun tink i duno wats goin on ar... haha... all in all... jia you n gd luck... =)

~~永远的信徒，死了都要爱。 2:31 PM

LOL. sam! i can burst out laughing reading ur draft la! hahahahahaha. its sooooo funny! hm.. not sure if i should post the back part. its so mean can! what hints?! its freakin obvious la. LOL. ok nvm. let me think bout it.

anyhows. some random ramblings now. you wont understand. dont bother killing your brain cells figuring out alrite.

[taken off]

end. blog will officially be closed. YES SAM. CLOSED. and i wont re-open it till 17nov. smses will not be entertained unless they're bout some serious stuff. dont bug distract me or anything. 11:11 PM

seems like deathnote replayed in the real world. everywhere i turn, i see a funeral being held. was walking to take a bus to tuition today and a funeral was held just next to a childcare centre. i took a peek in and i saw a middle-aged lady's photo placed in front of the coffin. and another one when i was on the bus back home. the relatives were moving the paper house which was like 2m tall at least. probably to some empty space to burn. and another one just round the corner of my house. 2 actually. wow wow wow.

the paper house reminded me of my grandfather's. sigh. took me back to the scene 6 years ago. i could vividly rem i was only half-way thru my prelims. my parents rushed to pick me up from sch. at his death bed, when my uncle pronounced him dead. i was sitting there. when i heard my mom burst out crying, i dont know why but i was still telling myself "he's still here." it was only a few seconds after that i finally registered his death.

really miss him alot. didnt get to interact much with him when he was still around. silly me. and when my mom took out an old literature book, i found a piece of writing that was his. his beautiful cursive writing and his signature long tails of the alphabet "f". i read it. it was a review on a poem. he didnt finish it. maybe he did. who knows.

and now, my bro is at nuh sitting by the bed belonging to his friend who is on the verge of leaving this world. cancer. last stage. apparently his situation turned for the worse and they stopped all forms of medication. i picked up the phone. my bro's voice was solem. i could tell there was sadness and grief in it. smth i've never heard bef.

emo again. life's fragile. i never thought i would have 2nd hand experience of someone so young passing on. (note: its on. not away. ) its so tv-drama you know? but i guess its better for him. after all, its cancer. the pain and shit he had gone through. its time to ease them all. release him from all that torture.

and i dont even know him. funny isnt it? how i can be affected by just a single line "ask mommy to the phone." its as though we're (or rather, they) waiting for him to die. literally. the cruel deadly truth. sigh. 11:39 PM

farewell ended ytd. bef that, rach and i went to sch earlier to enjoy a short cam-whoring photoshot experience. ahhh... rach, my pillar photo is blur! ur shaky hands. groans. haha. anw, elsa came aft that and joined in the fun. i guess the whole thing started at ard... 620?

yup. so it started off with a buffet dinner. cjs again i suppose? anw, we had our very own waiter/waitress! lol. mine was iven peh. someone least expected. my impression of him changed definitely. honestly speaking, i didnt think very well of him initially. then again, who doesnt make mistakes? yup. haha. he proved me wrong. oh yes, the food. loke was complaining when our table had more food than his when they had 4 guys and we had 4 girls. HAHA. too bad.

ms ngiam bought us a cake too! choc banana from secret recipe. OMG. fabalicious! yummm. thank you! took a few ugly jump shots and james was our photographer. had a really tough time trying to coordinate with the bloody cam. hahaha. presents time aft that. iven got me a pair of pretty diamond studs! gorgeous. and a pretty lil card with sweet thank-yous inside. thank you!

and so the sharing session came. each of us were supposed to think of smth to say but i guess not many did. sam was fully prepared for it thou. she wrote her script la! lol. lari cried while thanking huis. aww. its amazing how strong friendships can be.

photo shots again after a cheer-off. cheering. smth every councillor will definitely miss doing. ): my cam died! crap. i should get a spare battery. mine's spoilt. i wonder why. hur hur. so gracious rach took some for me. haha. send me send me send me!

bef i knew it, the whole thing ended. sigh. its a pity only half of the 28th turned up. and jean is in michigan! well, at least she 'shared' her experience thanks to brynner. or at least he claims so. lol. 29 did a great job planning this whole thing for us. thou its simple and everything, it expresses all their thanks and gratitude to us. loved it. thank you!

rushed off to yan's birthday celebration holding the rose brandon gave me. ahh... i looked like im going on a blind date can. so embarrassing. LOL. by the time i reached, it was alr 1030. at least i made it for the last duet song which was replayed for duno how many times cos some people were too shy to sing tgt. hahaha. anw, went to holland v's coffee club after that for a late night supper. loads of suaning as usual on the bus. hehe. crepe mushroom is soooo good! elsa, u should try it. its mushroom-saturated. heaven. hahaha. and the mud pie! the chef must be in a real good mood last night. the plate was prettily-deocrated with choc la! the previous time i went there it was just mud-pie topped with choc powder. but anyhows, its huge k. had to share it with sam.

that quite sums it all up for ytd evening. a day ending on the right note. photos will be up soon when i get all of them.

life can be real funny sometimes. you take a long walk outside to venture and explore the new world to find out that what you wanted is actually in your own backyard. hm.

jie! you'll never believe what i must tell you! screams!!! 3:49 AM

chilled. thats the end of those two. blocked and not replying. they're out of my league and no longer exist in my memory. (how i wish. lol.) im fine. im someone who needs to let off some steam and things will be fine aft that. yup yup.

and im not blaming anyone. i think you know this msg is going out to you. im not angry or whatsoever. i just want to be left alone.

time is running out. but my momentum is going downslope. lesser and lesser stuff are covered every day. less papers finished. overdued work piling up. gosh.

blog closed. till further notice. 9:53 PM

im so annoyed, frustrated and pissed off now i cant do anything but yell! damnit. if only i could. my bro's sleeping and basically, the house is pretty quiet. any noise higher than 50decibels ( is this how the magnitude of waves are measured? i dont take phy. ) and my bro will look at me with his sleepy glare. GROANS.

"i dont know if its a coincidence but everytime i msg you you say you're studying. sigh. [blah blah blah]"

do you mind?! my freaking As are in a few weeks time and you're telling me this! my fcuking results are far more impt than entertaining your nonsense alrite?! who do you think you are?! you're not even my anyone. and even if you were, SCREW YOU.

"eh plan our outing alr not?"

dont you just get it that i dont want and will NOT go out with you?! im dropping damn bloody obvious hints alr and you simply are tooooooo blind to get it. CRAP. even if i have to be left on the shelf, i will never EVER be with a guy like YOU.

MEN ARE SUCH A DRAG.





ok fine. thats a stereotype. i have other great guy pals out there to know that is a wrong statement to make. fyi, they are DIFF people and thats making things worse when i was abt to complete a math pp and they fcuking hell hafta slow me down by saying those comments.

blame me for reading. blame me for not switching my phone off when im studying. i think i should from now onwards. DONT BLAME ME IF I DONT REPLY.

and i just left an extremely random note on jie's blog bout this. haha. JIE! YOU HAVE TO AGREE! i wont mind our relationship to be in the dark. LOL. oh wts.

have to do my bloody testimonial. my god. this is sooooo shameless. praising yourself. and it wasnt supposed to be my job in the first place. GROANS.

i need some time out. 12:04 AM

gee. thanks for all the consolation and encouragement peeps. im alrite now. just needed to vent that out. the "create a post" page was right in front of me when the nagging was on. so what a good way to pass the nagging on. hehe.

im addicted to vanilla latte. but do you call that an addiction when you've only drank sipped it once? that most of what you've drunk is mere foam and your tongue got burnt aft that? lol. whatever. but its really really nice!

thought of satisfying that craving today by heading down to a coffeebean or starbucks to study. but i woke up at 11! gosh. since when i sleep late and wake up late huh.. should get down to serious coffee gulping soon. hehe.

disney channel took away martin mystery! wts?! its childrens' day hols and you're doing this to me! ahhh... they replaced it with kuzco academy. EEKS! changed to cartoon network and guess what was playing. winx club. OMG. CHANGE CHANNEL! lol. (oops, rach.) so now im super duper bored and am deprived from my usual 5 to 630 cartoon break! damn. 6:23 PM