yeah im being paranoid. haha. thanks to all for the assurance, though nth is definite till the truth is out. lets put that aside for now.

no longer working at sheer romance. it was definitely a great learning experience. gonna miss my colleagues alot, esp Josie. working with her is hella loads of fun, cracking jokes and poking fun at each other. listening to her life stories. she's 44 btw. perhaps im not professional enough to continue working there. last min notices. underlying meanings. there're times where i really wanted to just quit on the spot, feeling my pride has become a floor mat stepped on by dozens of dirty feet. my bosses expect alot from me esp, since they urgently need someone when i have zero sales experience.

still, i wont regret working there. it was an opportunity for me to realise my shortcomings and strengths. know what kind of people i can and cannot work with. learning to be streetsmart. so on.

if anyone's interested, i chose the easier and more comfortable way out. i think its time that i did smth for myself. im not trying to imply im a saint here but aft all the shit i went tru, i know im not ready to go tru it twofold. its the best way out actually, cos i know what the consequences are if i made the politically correct choice and they arent pretty.

for now, im just gonna devote my time to work, reading and catching up with old friends. the book im reading currently is the Five People you Meet in Heaven. next up? maybe Tuesdays with Morrie. ive missed out so much when i was in nh and its time for some long catching up. hehe.

fel, joey, sai, jie, xin! lets meet up real soon! (: 1:05 PM

what i thought to be an enjoyable off-day catching a movie n eating out came to an end with a rather worrisome note. it started off when kerwin mentioned bout As results coming out real soon. it suddenly dawned on me that the dreadful day is bout to arrive. 1month and a week's time. to put it simply, 5 weeks. to make things worse, my mom happens to work in SEAB, (Singapore Examination n Assessment Board) and my immediate family will get to know my results bef me. how nice... =/ n yup, i cant ask her cos its the way things go over there. (duh.)

i dont have confidence in my work. its not SA teachers marking anymore. its the British. you know nuts bout their preferences in writing style or whatever. handwritting especially. i hope they wont dread my awful scribbles for my econs scripts. when i say awful, i mean like real awful. big and ugh. yes. i rem nic burst out laughing when he saw it. and mel in great alarm saying: are those ur words?

there was one night when i dreamt i got ABB and a freakin c5 for GP. hoho. but yup, dreams are dreams you know. i believe it isnt some premonition thing but just me getting paranoid and stirred up some weird images in my head.

1 thing to rejoice bout is that CNY falls bef it. so i wont need to keep repeating myself to concerned relatives and friends bout how badly ive done. you know how painful that'll be, explaining to each and everyone of them where i'll be heading when i totally have no clue with screwed up results? spare me the agony.

5 weeks. in a blink of an eye, the slip of paper'll be in my hands. it sends a shiver down my spine. 12:42 AM

here's a qn thats been bothering me for quite a while.
when you're stuck in the middle and given a choice, will you:
(a) do whats politically correct?
(b) choose the more/most comfortable path for you?
(c) to hell with it. take a risk n let fate decide?

hoho. and i thought things are finally going my way. shrugs. answers please. 'll be greatly appreciated.

i miss home cooked food. today is the first time i ate mommy's cooking ever since we moved in. yummilicious! i finally get to have my own room now. whats more, the com and tv are in my room too! wahahahaha. at least now i dont need to interrupt no.1's sleep when i use the com. but the wind's real strong over here. my fingers are freezing cold typing this entry. hoho.

cant stand fast food now. accumulating all those trans-fat in me. eeks! whats worse, LJ has poor service attitude. slamming the table. making reluctant remarks and so on. crap. if i didnt wanted to blow this up, this'd gone to the management. (perhaps blogging bout this'll eventually send a signal to them. hur hur.)

settling down at work. whew. its bout time. all thanks to my colleagues n bosses who've given me so much advice and pointers along the way. n of cos, chances one aft another. the valuable experience is smth you'll never get to learn in sch. n im a fortunate shit to work with great colleagues like them. 11:40 PM

make-up sure is expensive. OUCH. i think if it wasnt for my job, i dont know when i'll start coloring my face. hur hur. (ok maybe uni. for my presentations.) but oh well. at least im working now. and $200 richer when dearest SAJC decided to reward me for my good progress. hehe.

so now im a supporter of Body Shop. hm, i dont know why but i feel assured buying their products. maybe its all the Save the Earth and whatever campaigns. pamper myself and do some charity at the same time. (though i must admit its a good way to boost their sales, targetting customers like me.)

work work and more work. str since sunday. great. 10 to 12 hours of standing, plastic smiles and repeated recommendations of apparrel. hoho. ytd was like some meet-my-friends day. so many people popped by the shop! tze kwang, ching tung, shih ying (and she finally wore a skirt! JIE U SHOULD HAVE BEEN THERE. lol.) leow, raymond, jovial. and steph works just below me! what a small world. hahaha.

work is fine, i guess. my colleagues are great. differences in working style is inevitable. i just hate the screwed up management system. if you as a boss informs your employees at the very last min, you cant expect your subordinates to be punctual regarding their reports rite? shrugs. but ITS OK. im only a part-timer. maybe when i start sch, i'll switch to a weekend part-time job elsewhere. like Body Shop! hehe. 12:59 AM

12:35 PM